My friend Gubby once had a roommate named Dale who was much smarter a
few years older than we were. Dale asked me out once. One time.
It was spring of 1986 and Pioneer Days -- the festival that made Chico State notorious (with the help of MTV and about 20,000 out-of-town partiers) -- was in full swing. I was 20 with a bad perm, braces and no fake ID. Dale must have been unstable, looking back.
Dale picked me up in his tiny little convertible -- an old MG Midget or something -- and we drove downtown to have dinner. The sun was still pretty high in the sky on that early May evening.
(Original photo stolen from these guys)
I don't remember where we ate, what movie we went to later, or what we talked about. All I remember is The Hook.
A good song has a "hook" that makes you sing, dance or take off your clothes.
A good movie has a "hook" that keeps you from changing channels or leaving to go take off your clothes.
And a good date has a "hook," too. Some might say it's when you take off your clothes, but you didn't hear that from me.
This date had a hook.
We sat in the car at the curb near one of the busiest intersections in downtown Chico. We were parked right outside The Oaks Bar & Grill, which was HOPPING.
We were about the same distance away from the world-famous Madison Bear Garden (a crowded college spot we just call The Bear), as was the photographer who took this photo:
(Original photo stolen from teejayhanton on Flickr)
It was bustling, it was Pioneer Week (the last one before The Pioneer Week To End All Pioneer Weeks*), and I was not old enough to legally buy a drink.
So naturally, Dale brought the alcohol to me.
He made me close my eyes while he set up. If you've ever been inside an MG Midget you'll know that a womb has more elbow room. I heard the squeak of cork as Dale opened the wine, heard the gurgle of wine poured into glasses, smelled popcorn all of a sudden -- where was he hiding that? -- and then I opened my eyes.
We had a blast drinking wine in the tiny parked car, as throngs of people and police surged by. It was like being naked in a fishbowl, but somehow no law enforcement witnessed our crime.
It was a pretty good hook for a date, but no sparks flew, no one got naked or arrested, and I moved away a couple of weeks later.
Seriously, I did NOT take off my clothes. For real.
*If you care to see very old footage of the 1987 Chico State Pioneer Days Riots, click here. I was 3000 miles away at the time so you can't blame me for it.
It was spring of 1986 and Pioneer Days -- the festival that made Chico State notorious (with the help of MTV and about 20,000 out-of-town partiers) -- was in full swing. I was 20 with a bad perm, braces and no fake ID. Dale must have been unstable, looking back.
Dale picked me up in his tiny little convertible -- an old MG Midget or something -- and we drove downtown to have dinner. The sun was still pretty high in the sky on that early May evening.
(Original photo stolen from these guys)
I don't remember where we ate, what movie we went to later, or what we talked about. All I remember is The Hook.
A good song has a "hook" that makes you sing, dance or take off your clothes.
A good movie has a "hook" that keeps you from changing channels or leaving to go take off your clothes.
And a good date has a "hook," too. Some might say it's when you take off your clothes, but you didn't hear that from me.
This date had a hook.
We sat in the car at the curb near one of the busiest intersections in downtown Chico. We were parked right outside The Oaks Bar & Grill, which was HOPPING.
We were about the same distance away from the world-famous Madison Bear Garden (a crowded college spot we just call The Bear), as was the photographer who took this photo:
(Original photo stolen from teejayhanton on Flickr)
It was bustling, it was Pioneer Week (the last one before The Pioneer Week To End All Pioneer Weeks*), and I was not old enough to legally buy a drink.
So naturally, Dale brought the alcohol to me.
He made me close my eyes while he set up. If you've ever been inside an MG Midget you'll know that a womb has more elbow room. I heard the squeak of cork as Dale opened the wine, heard the gurgle of wine poured into glasses, smelled popcorn all of a sudden -- where was he hiding that? -- and then I opened my eyes.
We had a blast drinking wine in the tiny parked car, as throngs of people and police surged by. It was like being naked in a fishbowl, but somehow no law enforcement witnessed our crime.
It was a pretty good hook for a date, but no sparks flew, no one got naked or arrested, and I moved away a couple of weeks later.
Seriously, I did NOT take off my clothes. For real.
*If you care to see very old footage of the 1987 Chico State Pioneer Days Riots, click here. I was 3000 miles away at the time so you can't blame me for it.
Here is correct link for the MGB-GT http://www.mgcars.org.uk/pics/mgbgt1.jpg
Posted by: Gubby aka ijefff | February 17, 2010 at 07:23 PM
Youre trying to get me arrested with that link, arent you Gub? I think my ISP address just went into a little file somewhere, on some watch list . . .
GAHHH youre funny. You should have a blog, Gubby. Ill set one up for you on Squarespace. Be right back.
Posted by: foolery | February 17, 2010 at 05:55 PM
It's a good thing you waited until the statue of limitations had expired - times 3 - before you went public with your youthful transgression. :-) I can just imagine what the police radio transmission would sound like, "Dispatch we have 2 nerds drinking wine in front of The Oaks in a vintage British sports car. Please check for any warrants and gang affiliation, Over".
The only way Chico PD would have arrested you two, would have been if you guys had fire-bombed The Oaks on the way to the El-Ray to see a movie.
By the way Dale's car was a MGB-GT see here: http://www.mgcars.org.uk/pics/
Well, at least you didn't hit Dale's car and then give him cookies- I never would have heard the end of that. See for reference - http://foolery.typepad.com/foolery/2008/09/help-me-settle-this-argument.html
Posted by: Gubby aka ijefff | February 17, 2010 at 05:06 PM
Didn't you mean to say that you left town to avoid arrest?? You just never thought the riot would get THAT out of control? It will be OUR little secret;)
I have some of those after-hours hot tub photos of Grandma J....just sayin"!
Posted by: big hair envy | February 17, 2010 at 12:10 PM
THAT isn't the entire story. I have witnesses and pictures.
Call me to find out where to send the black male cash (or is that black person?), let's just call it black mail and quit arguing.
Posted by: Audubon Ron | February 17, 2010 at 10:55 AM
That picture of you at 16 or whatever really, really reminds me of a young friend of mine, from some years ago. I even did a blog post about her.
It's here; http://mightyfowl.blogspot.com/2009/12/and-she-had-one-in-mine.html
Posted by: Bob Cleveland | February 17, 2010 at 09:52 AM
Clearly he was gay.
Right?
I mean the Midget, the ability to pre-plan, the lack of sparks...WITH YOU no less.
My gaydar is going off like crazy.
Posted by: The Glamorous Life Association | February 17, 2010 at 07:10 AM
The mere mention of bad perms makes me convulse, but you wore yours exceptionally well. He would have asked you out again if you hadn't moved, I'm sure of it.
Those MGs didn't have much elbow womb, did they?
Posted by: Chesapeake Bay Woman | February 16, 2010 at 06:37 PM
You know whats funny, grandma j? YOURE RIGHT -- I was only 16 in this photo. I dont have any photos of 20 scanned, but believe me, I looked just like this. Except with braces. For real. And if I recall correctly, *I* wasnt the one in the hot tub after hours, *ahem*. ; )
@KathiD, youre absolutely right. Somehow Im certain it was my fault. But we didnt get drunk (one small glass each) and nobody had to hold my hair that night, which is good. Shut up, Gubby -- I hear you thinking out there.
SMBS, you flatter me.
Beej, you flatter me.
Thanks for playing, you guys!
Posted by: foolery | February 16, 2010 at 03:15 PM
You look so cute but only 16 in that picture! The 80's big hair didn't help.
I think the Chico State Pioneer Days Riots prbably ended when you left town.
Blog Fest '10 is right around the corner.
Posted by: grandma j | February 16, 2010 at 03:05 PM
I blame you for it anyway. In a good way.
Posted by: KathiD | February 16, 2010 at 02:13 PM
Interesting hearing things from the female perspective. From a guys point of view (not necessarly all men) it would sound something like. "She looked great, but her brother lied when he said she was over 21. Did what I could to get her drunk and take advantage of her, but couldn't get to 1st base in that tiny car with all those people around....so ended the evening early, went home and took a cold shower. Maybe next week will be better."
Posted by: SMBS (Single Male Blog Stalker) | February 16, 2010 at 01:39 PM
This post is Reason #543 why I love you so much. Specifically, the kissy lips on that hawt picture of you.
Posted by: Bejewell | February 16, 2010 at 12:35 PM