(Photo stolen from these guys)
I'm going to tell you something I haven't told you before.
I am an independent consultant for Mary Kay Skin Care. Technically, I suppose, it's Mary Kay Cosmetics, or maybe Mary Kay, Inc., but I prefer to say Mary Kay Skin Care. It's my blog.
There, now I've told you. And NO, I don't drive a pink Cadillac (though I know someone who does) because GAHHH you have to be reeeeally reeeeally . . . a lot of things that I'm not -- yet -- to drive a pink Cadillac.
And NO, I don't wear pink all the time and YES, I rebel against panty hose because? When the President of the United States gets MORE respect for wearing panty hose in August than when he went without in July, I'll buy a whole truckload of L'Eggs. Which is about how many I'll need, for the week.
Also, when it cools off I won't be such a panty hose rebel, but I have actually passed out from overheating before and I refuse to do that again. This time in a dress. And heels.
But that's not what I came here to tell you today. I told you all that so I could tell you THIS:
I had a pretty close call a few weeks ago, while driving home from my Friday night Mary Kay skin care class. Zipping along East Avenue doing about 45mph in the left lane, I was suddenly faced with a 70s model Ford pickup veering wildly from his lane and headed straight for me. Our closing speed would surely have been over 100mph. Don't ask me how I know it was a 70s model Ford; some people see angels and white lights? I see unimportant details.
I drive by that spot twice a day, five times a week, and I can still see the skid marks where his tires left the street and climbed the curb onto the median, wrecking a sign and probably taking out some landscaping. He managed to correct his truck a second before he would have plowed into me, and then it was all over, just like that. I had two or three cars behind me, no place to pull over for a block or so, and nothing to pull over for -- he was gone like nothing happened. Pretty much, nothing DID happen.
But what if it had?
Okay, I told you all of that so I could tell you THIS:
Thursday night we had the Mary Kay equivalent of a knighthood ceremony: one of the young women in our area, Alicia, achieved director status. We had an event to honor her, in a rented hall, and it was very nice. Hot, but nice. Alicia gave a talk, as you would expect, and she was very energetic and extremely funny. But it was hot and humid in there and I got pretty loopy -- remember I told you about heat and me? -- and I started daydreaming during the ceremony. No breakfast, no dinner and a sluggish swamp cooler, and my listening powers go completely kaput. I daydreamed that I was up in front of 50-60 people, telling them my Mary Kay story. I dreamed I reached deep into my heart and found the moment when I knew I was bound to be a Mary Kay success -- a Cadillac-driving, panty-hose-wearing, Mary Kay director.
That moment came just before the averted impact, just before the 70s Ford pickup got control and saved us both.
Was I thinking, "My children! I want to see my children grow up!" Well, was I?
Was I thinking, "How could this happen when I have so much left to do with my life?"
I was thinking, "NOT IN THIS STUPID BEATER CAR! I WANT TO DIE IN MY MARY KAY CAR!!"
(Photo stolen from these guys)