I Am NERD, Hear Me Wheeze

I am trying to put my cholesterol level through the roof and think I might possibly succeed, since my refrigerator currently looks rather like an incubator at a psychedelic chicken ranch. Mmmm, hard-boiled eggs.

So I have hardly touched the computer since Friday and have done no writing whatsoever. Here it is, Monday, and I am trying to come up with something interesting.

HA.

I did, however, come up with a topic that holds a great deal of interest for me:

When did you know you were a nerd? Or, more specifically, what is your earliest nerdly memory?

If you don't consider yourself a nerd, please disregard the question and go get me a Home Run Pie, thanks. We'll talk about you while you're out.

If you DO consider yourself a nerd, I'd love to hear about your earliest signs of Nerdism.

Here are mine.

First, it has been well-established that I was a Band Geek, all through high school and even my first year of college. Band Geekery actually began for me in the third or fourth grade, when I began learning the clarinet, the better to be more like Henry Cuesta. If you know who that is, give yourself a million points, fire up your pocket protector and go get me a Home Run Pie, thanks.



(Photo stolen from this site)

My first nerdly memory is of dissecting the bad grammar, poor sentence structure and limited vocabulary of popular songs. Yeah, I know -- I didn't say it was going to be easy reading this post. You may want to go get me a Home Run Pie instead.  The words "ain't got no" in a song put me into a tailspin. Oh, if only my pre-adolescent self could see me now, starting sentences with "and," "but," and "or," or posting a No Punctuation Wednesday piece, or creating fragment sentences with gay abandon.

At about age 9 I committed to memory vast quantities of dated pop music lyrics from my mom's piano songbook. Here, for your listening pleasure, are some lyrics from the song "Alfie," which is very likely on page 2 of the songbook:

What's it all about, Alfie?
Is it just for the moment we live?
What's it all about, when you sort it out, Alfie?
. . . if only fools are kind, Alfie
Then I guess it is wise to be cruel . . .

Okay that's just about enough of THAT. I didn't Google it so those lyrics may be all wrong, but I don't think so. See? Ask me another one. I am self-taught and it has NEVER paid off.

So, tell me your nerd story, here or on your own blog (leave a link). I'll be waiting with my inhaler and my pocket protector. By the way, I have no idea if I even LIKE Home Run Pies.



(Photo stolen from this site)

Comments

[MomZombie]

I didn't think of myself as a nerd at the time but I played a lot of chess as a child. I read Bobby Fisher strategy books. When we moved, I went to a CHESS CLUB MEETING.
When I saw who else showed up, I said I had to go to the bathroom and didn't come back. I avoided nerds until college, then I was inexplicably attracted to them.

[Cactus Petunia]

Tell your mother I have that same piano songbook. The one with "Lara's Theme" from Dr. Zhivago...Technically, I'm not cut out to be a nerd. I'm more of a geek. An art geek. Alas, I don't have the chops to be a nerd. Sighhh.

[Chesapeake Bay Woman]

I love nerds. I think I hover somewhere between nerds and birds, you know the flighty ones with ADD. I also identify with turds, but sometimes they stink.

[Meg]

Oh wait, thought of more: I sang the National Anthem at the boys' basketball games, and when I was done with that, I took my place in the stands behind the video recorder and taped the games. (yes, way.)

Also, I once corrected my English teacher's spelling on the black board. I think he misused an apostrophe. Which I HATE to this day.

[Meg]

Oh, so much unmined earth here... Well. I liked Lawrence Welk, Tony Orlando & Dawn, Sony & Cher, Donnie & Marie and all those other 70s variety shows. I was a band geek - oboe, sax - broke out briefly and got to twirl a silk flag and was an OFFICER of the band, so that slightly mitigated my nerdiness. Briefly. Played no sports whatsoever, save for a brief stint in right field for a few innings of the 1984 girls softball season. Oh, and I was in the Swing Choir - other schools called it Show Choir. I could go on but I'm running out of electrons.

And don't get me started on diagramming sentences. Oh my, we will have so much to discuss in July!

[Little Miss Sunshine State]

Hi! I'm kinda new here (you leave funny comments on Bossy).
Yes, I am a nerd.
In 4th grade I wanted to produce a play about Marco Polo. None of my classmates would agree to be in the play.

In 6th grade I was told that I couldn't hang out with the pretty girls anymore because they voted that my clothes were too nerdy.

In high school, I played the bass drum in the marching band.

As an adult, there has been nothing remotely cool about me. Is that Nerdly enough to join the club?

[Jason]

My earliest nerdly memory? Nerdly memory. Nerdly. Nerdly. That is so funny if you say it over and over again. Nerdly.

I was always a nerd. As I child I was in elementary school I was an effeminate nerd. Talk about twice the ridicule. When I was in junior high I was an effeminate nerd with severe acne and homemade jeans. By high school I had figured some stuff out and thanks to Acutane I no longer suffered with zits, so I was a nerd disguised as a regular, heterosexual, unremarkable person. With outstanding grades that were top secret.

In college a friend and I were making a magazine collage about ourselves for a class. I found a phrase in one magazine that I used as the caption for my collage:

"THE NERD WHO MADE IT"

Well for heaven's sake. Would you look at that? I just wrote my next post.

[Kyddryn]

When I was five or six years old, I would sing throughout the day. I didn't speak, I sang. Everything. Sometimes in French, because I could.

When I was a little older, I wanted to be the voice of the computer on Star Trek. Still do. And the voice of the Atlanta airport, the telephone information system, or some company's voice-mail system. And while I'm at it, a documentary narrator or a cartoon character, because I've always dreamt of being animated. Hah!

I played D&D (with graph paper and D6 because that's all we had, and we liked it!), still would if I had the time.

To this day, I always have yarn, hooks, a jar of bubbles and something to read handy, because one never knows...

Also, I have a titanium spork that could go on my key chain if I hadn't crocheted and felted a bag for it, and collapsible chopsticks (they unscrew at the middle - the base is hollow, brushed steel with marine-brass fittings, the tip is recycled Japanese baseball bat wood and it fits in the base) in their own little carrier.

I dunno if that makes me a nerd or a geek, though...probably some sort of cross-bred hybrid. Yeah, that's it, I'm A Neek!

Shade and Sweetwater,
K

[Caution Flag]

Sweetheart, not only do I know who Henry Cuesta is, I went to see him in concert (with the rest of the LW band.) Enough said.

[all things BD]

I discovered my nerdiness in high school, along with two other friends. We called ourselves the NAU'S, which was one of their last names. It stood for Nerds Are Us. I think that is the height of nerdiness when you start a club, with a nerdy acronym and everything. We never went to parties, actually LIKED our parents, and went to the library for FUN.

[Auds at Barking Mad]

When did my own nerdiness revelation hit me?

When I realized that I actually LIKED watching Lawrence Welk with my geriatric aunts. Oh and Merv Griffin too!

And how many other people do you know that enjoy Archery (target shooting only! I refuse to shoot anything with a pulse, unless of course...well no, nevermind!) and were actually GOOD at it and had plans to go to the Olympics...but then they got pregnant and well....

Oh and only a nerd would think Bill Nighy is HOT!

OMG I just realized I can leave a comment again! GO ME!

[Da Goddess]

I, too, played the clarinet. But I was a nerd long before that.

I NEVER did think normally, or for that matter, come up with normal kid games. Nope, I was stuck in my imaginary world, even when I was playing with other kids. It was as if I lived in two worlds simultaneously.

Thankfully, my friends liked me anyway.

So, my official answer? Probably around 1968 or 1969.

[Elaina Avalos]

I think I came out of the womb a nerd.

But I think the real proof was probably in the
1987-ish range. I was very sick as a child (elementary school) so a teacher from the school district came to our house. Anywho, that's why I was home all day. Whenever Marlin Fitzwater gave a press conference for the President, I would get so ridiculously excited. And then, as if my Mom was interested, I would tell her all about it.

But it gets worse. I also started watching The McLaughlin Group religiously when I was a kid and hated missing Meet the Press. Yeah. HUGE nerd. HUGE.