Marriage must be in the air, now that thoughts of young men are turning
to . . . baseball. Yeah, well, when Marcy at The Glamorous Life
told the Internuts all about her friend who had asked for her help to propose to his long-time girlfriend*,
I thought two things. One: HELL yeah, I'm in. Two: Me? Is she joking?
I'm the least romantic and most girly-inhibited person she knows. How
can I help? I mean, I was proposed to in a bar. I got married
about an hour after getting a latte at the beach in my holey jeans, and
my hair was even still damp (it always is). What can I possibly bring
to this party that won't turn it into a laughingstock?
And then I remembered the two greatest pieces of marital advice ever.
The first was from two of my husband's college volleyball friends, Dave and Mary. They make marriage look easy and like a heckuva lot of fun. I'll never forget what they said to us -- they said, "Always --" no, wait, it was "Never . . ." um . . . Oh yeah. Their card to us read
The second fantastic piece of advice was something Chas and I concocted. Here it is:
Oh. My. Goodness. Al Green is better than Marvin Gay with his "Sexual Healing," although that ain't bad . . . Everyone should be given this album before they walk down the aisle. (Not before the wedding, because we'd just have a whole bunch of pregnant brides, and really? None of us need the extra stress of THAT.) If every married couple had to listen to "Love and Happiness" and "Tired of Being Alone" every time they argued, marital fights would drop dramatically. We might even pick fights with each other just for the, um, fun of it.
So if you must fight, and you will, first turn on Al Green, then get naked, oil up, and -- oh never mind, that was something else . . . anyway, good luck fighting.
Also? Best of luck to you, young bride and groom to be. I'm thrilled to have been a part of your big day.
Where are my pants . . .
UPDATE, 6:05 P.M. PDT: AND NOW YOU MUST GO CHECK OUT THIS LINK TO UNDERSTAND THE WHOLE STORY
GO ON, GIT!!!
*Seriously, do go check out Marcy's post for Tuesday 3/24/09. There are LOTS of people involved in this story, and I think -- no, I KNOW -- you'll kick yourself later if you don't follow along.