Smedley and Sparky's Anti-Pregnancy Plan

(Poster stolen from The Humane Society)

Sparky, my kindergartener, brought a proposal to me this morning.  She's alarmed at the difficulty we've had getting the first young outside cat, Buckeye, spayed.  Buckeye has developed an infection at the point of incision and is on antibiotics for ten days, and she's wearing a cone on her neck to keep her from licking her wound.  It's been stressful for all of us (especially Buckeye), and the girls and Daddy are railing against the idea that two more outside cats must be spayed.

But they haven't accepted the true choice: spayed or euthanized.  We CAN'T have more kittens; it's ridiculous and grossly expensive to take care of a yard full of cats as it is, especially when you consider that people will forever drive by and dump more cats on us.  But this is the third cat on a 10-day round of antibiotics since Christmas, and the prospect of two more cats in queue makes all of us a little queasy.  And that's just the females!

So here's how Sparky presented her plan.

"Mommy, Smedley and I have come up with a plan to keep Green Eyes from having kittens.  Here's how it works:

1.  Keep away from males.

2.  Eat lots of fruit.

3.  Eat lots of grass.

4.  Keep away from other cats.

That way, Green Eyes won't have kittens.  Okay Mommy?"

Now why didn't I think of that?  Maybe we should spread the word to a certain unmarried unemployed bankrupt* California woman who is prone to litters.

Please spay and neuter your spouses pets.  The Humane Society's Spay and Neuter Day 2009 is February 24th.

*I am retracting the word bankrupt because of a reader suggestion that it was out of line. She's absolutely right and I'm leaving it here so that the comments make sense, but I shot my mouth off and I'm sorry about that.

Comments

[Rick's Cafe]

That's a great idea Mommypie - will do it with my daughters. They're in college, but can still be eaisly embarassed!

[mommypie]

You totally need to hang on to that list JUST so one day, when the girls are in high school, you can break it out and share it with their boyfriends over a big bowl of fruit.

[erin]

first of all, "clown car for a vagina" is an incredible phrase and is now my new favorite.

secondly, i think that since you will be paying for her and her children (absolutely, yes you will), you have the right to bitch about it.

thirdly, i'm really glad to learn that fruit and grass will do job. these pills are way beyond annoying.

[anon]

Today, the report came out that she does indeed receive food stamps. That can only get worse as she adds these 8 babies in. So, please disregard my fist comment. While we can't judge her on the bankruptcy, I do take issue with her adding more mouths to the welfare system. The Duggars and the rest of the multiple birth families were not in dire straights when they went into this, nor were they intentional in adding more mouths.
I totally agree that she's insane.

[imom]

I love how matter of fact Sparky and Smedley are with their plan! It makes perfect sense to them. It's admirable that you take care of these cats and take on the expense.

[Rick's Cafe]

So what ever happened to the "Free Kittens" sign?

Guess it must have disappeared with the times....replaced by the notion that freedom is no longer a two way street; where demands of apologizes surface as quick as differences of opinions.

But back to the kittens and an unapologetic observation. You've taught your children how life starts. Now could be a time to teach 1) The responsibility of starting life and how different species view that responsibility differently 2) That you can not save everyone. Sometimes, not even cute little kittens no matter how much you want to.

....but then, I'm not around to have to answer (or deal with the answers) to questions that little girls ask.

ps. I edited out #3 option that delt with the responsibilities of the new health czar that will be created if this "stimulus" package gets passed...figuring someone one would want me to apologize for my comments.

pps. figured #4, the problems arising from applying human morality to non-human species, would just be boring to this group.

[Kathi D]

If only I had been in possession of that plan, I could have avoided Brooklyn and Barkley's recent surgeries!

[Auds at Barking Mad]

After doing a little research into Octo-mom - which wasn't hard, Octo-granny and pappy, it appears, went into BK after bailing out Octo-mom and then had to move in with her and the 6 kids. They bought her the tiny bungalow she was sharing with her 6 children at the time and could no longer afford their own home and associated debts. MSN carried the story as well as Fox.

I posted about this the other day and only got a little slack over it. But in regards to the Duggars...NOT THE SAME THING AT ALL! The Duggars have money, and have had it long before they became a semi-hit on cable. They are 100% self-sufficient and whilst their life style might seem a tad odd and strange to some (including myself), they haven't done anything that reeks of question. Their litter isn't "celebrated" so much as how they live their lives and raise so many children and manage to be a happy, productive family. They have children because they feel each child is a gift from God and a blessing, and not to make up for a childhood spent as an only child, which is exactly what Nadya Suleman (Octo-mom) has stated as her reason for wanting to have several children. Also, the Duggars do not have high order multiples. The ages of their children are varied (I think they have two sets of twins), which also adds a different dimension than trying to take care of multiple BABIES.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not a fan of the Duggars...but I see so many comparisons between Suleman and the Duggars that I can't help saying something.

Either way, time will tell who picks up the slack for Suleman...whether it be the taxpayers in CA or some huge media outlet with money. Either way...it's really the children who will end up with the biggest deficit in the long run if she can't pull this off.

Oh and thanks for reminding me...we're getting Casey neutered on the 23rd. Decided not to stud him out. Of course, every time I say the "N" word around him, he looks at me with something that seems vaguely akin to thinly veiled contempt. *lol*

Sorry for the novel. I just have such strong opinions on this.

[Kyddryn]

You could argue that she's morally bankrupt...but that may be my judgmental ugliness and complete lack of comprehension as to why someone would do that rearing their heads.

I don't think making a celebrity out of ANY woman who has a clown car for a vagina is a wise idea...but again, perhaps that's me being judgmental...and as long as said woman/family isn't straining the State (and consequently their fellow citizens) with irresponsibility, and as long as said children aren't suffering privations from their basic needs because of the continuing reproductive antics of their parents, well...I can shut up.

I don't have to like it, and I don't have to support it by buying products from companies who encourage the behavior by sponsoring rosy little reality shows about it, but I will shut up about it - I am all about freedom and personal responsibility...one should be free to do as one wishes, and one should be free to bear the consequences of those actions.

I'll shut up, now.

Shade and Sweetwater,
K

[Chesapeake Bay Woman]

Yes, that Sparky is a genius. Eatings fruits and grass will most definitely create a shituation which is anything but conducive to reproduction.

[Bob Cleveland]

On the other hand, if they'd fed her enough fruit and grass, she'd have had trouble getting up off the crapper to go down to the clinic and get impregnated.

Maybe Sparky's onto something.

[foolery]

You know, you're absolutely right about the bankruptcy, anon -- I retract that. I was thinking that I had read that she herself was in bankruptcy, but now that I think about it I may have confused that with her mother, which is entirely separate.

But I for one am not celebrating the Dugger family. Their choices are theirs, not mine, but they go against my beliefs.

Thanks for reading and commenting! I don't blame you for staying anonymous, but I will never attack you for a difference of opinion. :)

-- Laurie

[anon]

I don't think it's fair to judge her by her mother's bankruptcy. A bankruptcy we don't know the circumstances of. Never has it been shown that she accepted state aid, only workman's comp for an injury, which her employer was required to pay.

Her choices have put no additional strain on the state as of yet. They might, but they haven't yet. So maybe demonizing someone who hasn't actually done anything wrong isn't quite fair. After all, the Duggers keep having kids and their "litter" is celebrated.